Airnews, March 2011
AIRBORNE SNOOZING, SMOOGING
WHAT IS without doubt the world’s largest helicopter and which has been dubbed the “Hotel ‘Copter” was due to have flown last year but, as far as can be established, it is still very much ground-bound. Two prototypes have apparently been built, both modelled on the Russian V-12 after the manufacturer, the US-based Hotel Copter Company, purchased a V-12 from the Mikhail Leontyevich Mil helicopter plant in Panki-Tomilino, Russia, in 2004. Work on the Hotel ‘Copter has been under way ever since on is described as the world’s first flying hotel.
The giant helicopter features 18 luxuriously-appointed rooms for adrenaline junkies seeking a truly unique and memorable travel experience. Each soundproofed room is equipped with a queen-sized bed, fine linens, a mini-bar, coffee machine, wireless Internet access, and all the luxurious appointments the rich and famous would expect from a flying five star hotel. Room service is available from one hour after liftoff to an hour prior to landing. All this for an undisclosed price. The Hotel ‘Copter has an overall length of 42 metres and stands 28 metres high. Its maximum takeoff weight is believed to be in the region of 105 850 kg. Its maximum speed is listed as 137 knots and cruising speed just ten knots slower. The aircraft’s range is reported to be 700 nautical miles slightly more than double the range of the Mil helicopter on which it is based.
Cruising at 127 knots it will cover its maximum range in a little over 5,5 hours. Taking into account that room service only begins an hour after lift-off and dinner will take the best part of an hour, that only leaves about 3,5 hours at the longest before landing, not really enough for a good night’s sleep – or otherwise…
MILE HIGH FLIGHTS GROUNDED
The British CAA has grounded a bed-laden Cessna Grand Caravan operated by Mile High Flights, a charter company based in Gloucestershire, England, because of what its owner, Mike Crisp, claims is “Some prudish snobbery on the part of the authority.”
The CAA disagrees because, it says, the company has failed to meet safety criteria and the regulatory agency will not renew the company’s operating licence. The flights have been operating for two years giving couples the opportunity to join the Mile High Club.
The CAA says the Mile High Flights’ Caravan has been fitted with a few seats and a bed separated from the flight deck by curtains. According to a CAA spokesman, “We cast no moral judgments on what people do in their ‘planes, that’s not our business. Safety is, that’s where we have discovered problems.” Exactly what those problems are has not been widely reported, but one source said the CAA had suggested in-flight activities on these special flights could prove distracting for pilots. Crisp says his work has proven to be “a very popular business idea.” The flights had offered Brits their chance at amorous airborne encounters starting at about £750. The CAA says Mile High Flights failed to offer safety chiefs the necessary assurances and otherwise the agency has “no issue” with the company’s business.
THE NAVIGATOR
What’s the old saying - Latitude is where you’re lost and longitude is how long you’ve been lost? The scene is sometime in the old era when cockpits had round dials plus flight engineers and navigators. The crusty oldtimer captain is breaking in a brand new navigator. The captain opens his briefcase, pulls out a .38 and rests it on the glare panel. He asks the navigator, “Know what this is for?” “No, sir,” replies the newbie. “I use it on navigators who get us lost,” explains the captain, winking at his first officer. The navigator then opens his briefcase, pulls out a .45 and sets it on his chart table. “What’s THAT for?” queries the surprised captain. “Well, sir,” replies the navigator, “I’ll know we’re lost before you will.”
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